"Strut"

I wish I had been consistent about blogging over the last few weeks. I am the girl who starts things, gets really excited about them, and then kind of fizzles out. I've done this countless times with many things in my life. I've started the "couch-to-5k" program at least 5 times in the last 2 years. I reach week 4 and get bored, or sick or just quit.

Well not this time, baby! Yesterday at 8:58 a.m. I finished the final run of the 9 week program. I started in January and could barely jog for 1 minute at a time. Now I can run for 30 minutes without stopping. And I love it.

When I tried to do it before my motives were all about weight loss and looking better. This time, it was completely different. My life is a little crazy right now and I needed something to help me find balance and handle stress...something other than chocolate. Chocolate has its place, but it just wasn't cutting it anymore as a coping mechanism.

When I run, I think about breathing, and music and however I'm feeling that day...sometimes strong, sometimes weak, sometimes happy. Something about the music and working so hard and sweating creates a calmness that pushes anxiety to the fringes of my brain and helps me cope with things a little better than usual.

I haven't quite found a way to describe the emotional connection that happens...but it's like there's a part of me that only wakes up when I run. I like that "me." That me is happy and strong and young and alive. Somehow over the last few weeks that "me" has integrated just a bit more into my everyday life.

I have a long way to go before I'm actually running 3 miles outside. Apparently running outside is a whole lot harder than the treadmill, but that's okay. When spring decides to actually stick around for more than a day I'll start working on that. In the meantime I'm ridiculously proud of myself. And I think I deserve to strut ;).

(I'm still trying to figure out how to attach this video...but here's the link:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V1e5h9YSe_k)